A few days ago I read an article from a famous politicians wife who was commenting on the fact that mothers were not happy staying at home and that without a career would be unfulfilled as people. I have been mulling over her comments for the past few days as they don't sit very well with me for some reason. LOL
First of all - she implied a few things that are totally untrue. Staying at home to raise your own children yourself does not mean that you cannot have a career or be successful. This article was quite clear that you needed to leave your home and your children with 'professionals' in order to achieve something in life.
Secondly, it was also stated that in her opinion, children should be raised from day one to be independent and to not need their mothers. I found this to be quite disturbing actually. Why on earth would be have children in the first place if we don't want to raise them, and what is wrong with needing each other?
These are biological needs, based on ancient hormonal pathways that have kept our species alive and moving forward or millions of years. This was a person who was in complete denial of that fact and was advising other mothers to be the same!
At the end of it all what would her regrets be? That she hadn't spent more time at work or talking on the phone or away from her family? That she should have had more nights out leaving her young children with baby sitters or that they might have been left more often in sterile child care centers with strangers?
I don't know about this woman giving young mothers advice on the finer points of children and child needs. She doesn't even indicate that she was present for most of her own children's childhoods! How much did she miss out on and if she has no regrets, well that is great.
However there are other ways to raise kids, there are other opinions and just maybe we are as entitled to our own way of thinking as she is. LOL
I know that I will never feel that time is wasted or lost when I am with my children, no matter what we are doing or where we are. And I am not ashamed to say that I need them as much as they need me. I am a strong presence in their lives, walking one step ahead making sure that the paths we follow are safe, healthy and best for us all.
If your life is not working out for you the way you want it to - and you have your own ideas about family life - make them a reality. Take steps today to change things for yourself and your children. You won't regret it and neither will they.
I guess at the end of the day here - what bothers me most about this article is that many people might compare themselves to this woman and believe that they need to follow her example and listen to her words and that couldn't be further from the truth.
When it comes to our children there is only one way forward - listen to your heart and follow your intuition, it will never steer you wrong.
Have a great day,